when i first get to know you, i thought you were just another hi-bye friend....
when you started asking me out the frequently, i thought you were just bored...
and when you started telling me about your past, i though you were very lonely...
however, on the 3rd of sep....u told me you like me....and i thought...it was just a temporial thought of yours...
on the first day, the day we got together...for some reason, i had this urge to tell to break away as friends...but for yet another reason, i didnt want to. till now, i still do not know whats the reason....
during the times we spend together, i felt like a different person..u were the first guy who was able to made me smile countless of times in a day and were also able to make me cry within one second...my mood has always been very influential towards the way you behave and talk around me....i can be smiling when u treated me like a princess....i can also be smiling even when u got angry with me for talking to another guy...
it has been a month plus and despite the daily meet ups we had, i still feel that i doesnt noe you that much at all....as much as i tried, it would only get worse....i wanted to know why you are always so stress up...but u never fail to tell me that you do not know also. even when i was with you, you never once share with me your problems....so how was i suppose to noe u better if u are so close up?
fact is, u do not really need me at all...with or without me, it doesnt make a difference at all...you do not need me at all when u are down. and you do not even need my advice to anything...you never agrees with me with anything....arguement and doubt was all you had....u never need me to take care of you at all....all you did was to push me away....
truth is, i was very unhappy and hurt...was hurt at the way you are behaving around me....hurt at the things you are doing....hurt that you never did draw a clear line between your present and past....hurt that you are still keeping the things you shared with her....hurt that you needed other people more....hurt that you never needed me with anything at all....
today, i saw the album again...and this time, they were taken out and the plastic bag that use to contain it, were folded and packed nicely aside. if you had no intention in sending the photos back, why lie to me? if u had the intention in sending back, why left it out on the table? im seriously done with you and her nonsense le...im done.... i give up...no use getting angry when u do not even care at all.no use telling you about the things that made me sad when u are not even listening at all..
during the first week, i saw this couple lab plastic bag at the back of your boot....and then the following day, the receipt was on the floor, next to your table. it was from the couple lab too....and it was dated on the august...if they do came from the little bear, does this mean that you were lying to me?
you may find it ridiculous that i was getting paranoid over nothing...but try putting yourself in my shoes....me talking to another guy was not at a big deal compared to you talking on the phone with her all the time. not a big deal at all as compared to you exchanging text with her...it was definitely
not a big deal as compared to you keeping the naked photos of you guys, kissing....nothing at all as compared to you keeping the photos of her and other girls in the fb...freaking nothing at all as compared to you putting photo of her as dp on the msn!
stop getting angry with me when u urself are doing it. u flare at me 2 times. and two times you made me cry. im just afraid that the next time you do that, i'll just go and never come back.....and maybe...at that point of time, you will realise, im not the one you want at all...