yesterday marks the end of our relationship and reflected on myself...
have i been a good girlfren to him? have i really pumped in the fullest?
all the questions just kept flashing...and as they flashed, this image just kept appearing...it was really there when i thought of you..."you release le?" "must be tiring ba?do you have face book?" " i add you?hotmail?msn? you later onliening?" "cat!you sleep already?"
these images are enough for me to stare into space for one slolid hour. and i don't know why these feelings seems so familiar. it was like i have been through this and history just kept repeating.
i felt myself falling into a deep sleep after all the crying. i just wanted to sleep and never wake up. found myself waking up a number of times but i refused to open up my eyes to think of yesterday.
i just wanted to sleep and sleep. because i was so tires living alone.
the fact that you could strike up a conversation with girls would mean that you were never satisfied with one girl alone. and that saddens me alot. what makes me wept louder was you actually did that because you saw me " doing the same thing to other guys"...and you wanted revenge. a byfriend, wanted a revenge against his own girlfriend...i dont even know who you are anymore.
u seek conversation with other girls because of boredom, and it will only lead things further,deeper....every sigle failed relationship starts of with this minor and inoocent act from either party. and to make it more accurate, it happen to me once upon a time.
and to only find myself landing in the same situation.
trust? i gave it to you when you assure me time and again.
forgiveness? i gave it to you because you promised to change..
chances? i gave them to you everyday because i believe that it was my fault that you have done the worng things.
but right now, i dont even know why i love you anymore.
i gave up so many things just because i wanted you to smile. i cried silently so that you wouldne feel so bad. i held things within myself because i know you wouldnt care. and..i do not want to see your " i dont care " face. i really hate it alot. i really do. it makes my heart breaks alot. and i hate it
you, looking for girls...chatting with other girls but send your own girlfren a short message. makes me wonder whether you were the one i wanted. since you wanted them so much....i will let you go...
because, even if we were to patch, i know that it will not be the same anymore. because, i will never be happy as long as the phone was with you, as long as you have the chance to talk to girls. all these things makes me cry all day long...for fear that i might lose you anytime. and i hated these feeling alot.
you might promise to delete all the girls in your contact. but you will still do it in the future.
i hate you